Time Warp

It's amazing how we age, yet never feel as old as we really are until we are forced back into our old stompin' grounds by a reunion. A few weeks I reunited with college sorority sisters to celebrate the 80th anniversary of Alpha Chi Omega. My sisters came from all parts of the country for two days of fun, memories and activities that we were way too old to partake in.  I was proud to be returning wearing pants two sizes less than the ones I left college wearing; however, my confidence was quickly squashed by students that looked like my own children. 

 

 It was definitely an experience. I drove 10 hours with my two best friends and former roommates enjoying stories that seemed like they were yesterday.  We laughed at old hair dos and finally came clean about boyfriends gone bad.  We made plans to visit all our old waterholes and it was declared that the weekend would not be a success unless I stayed out past 2 am.

 

The weekend was a success by those standards. We started the night off with a cook-out at the AXO house where we discussed how time had not changed the quality of the food. Only difference in 2009 is that girls no longer dip everything in ranch dressing.  They are way too smart for that, which might explain why they wear size 4 jeans and we wore 10s in college. 

 

The night progressed with a visit to Clydes’ where we once enjoyed Thursday night 4-for-1 drinks.  Twenty years later, you can still get four shots for the price of one. But price wasn't an issue now, as we returned as career women with money in our pockets and time to kill. After all it was only 10 pm. 

It was slightly uncomfortable standing at a bar with kids the age of my babysitters but after a cosmo or two it didn't seem to matter. By the way, I drank my first cosmo ever out of a paper cup. I was all class that night! 

 

At about midnight alcohol must have been driving men’s actions, because a man nearly half my age tried to pick me up.  I attributed it to some sick fantasy about a cougar although I’d like to believe it was my ageless looks.  None of his lines worked. Imagine a twenty-something telling you, "You are so hot, I don't know how to speak to you."  Oh, pleeeze! You got to do better than that! I'm the mother of four.  I had to hold back the laughter. 

 

 I did venture to the dance floor sometime after 1 am only to feel my knees crack while trying to imitate the moves of my younger peers. I might not feel like a forty-something year old woman, but my body was telling me otherwise.  Fortunately I wasn't on the receiving end of the worst one-liner of the night, "Are you here for parent's weekend?"  The women who received that one, flat out slapped the poor kid. 

 

I was released from my time warp at 2 am when Clyde’s flashed the lights for last call. Suddenly history repeated itself and I was escorted out of the bar. Guess no matter how old you are, some things never change!

 

 

Fun at Primrose, Part 1

It's great to have friends in so many places. Last weekend I was lucky enough to meet up with many virtual friends in the physical world.  We were hosted at a Primrose School in Morrisville, NC where local mom bloggers and kids enjoyed refreshments, play and lots of lively conversation. Get a dozen women in a room and it's amazing that the moms can make more noise than the kids!  In addition to chatting and chowing, we were able to take a tour and learn about Primrose Schools. In over 200 preschools across America, Primrose is passionately delivering on their promise to families—to be trusted partner and to provide the best in early childcare education. Thanks to Jennifer, Brandy, Cori, Debra, Tina, Pamela, Sarah, Molly, Lori, Malise, Mel and Mari for a fantastic time!

Jennifer of One Mom's World and Sarah of Real Life are planning a National Mom's Nite Out in Boone, North Carolina. The event will feature mom makeovers, pedicures, messages and much more.  For more information you should visit either woman's blog.   In Apex, NC, Molly Gold of Go Mom Inc. is organizing a National Mom's Nite Out with a different spin. The event happens in historic Apex and moms will enjoy a walk about through the streets of retailers, many of who are offering prizes, refreshments, special treatments and discounts.  For more information on this event, contact Molly@gomominc.com.  By the way, should you live outside of North Carolina and want to celebrate National Mom's Nite Out, visit www.momsniteout.com to find a party or celebration in your neighborhood.

 

Thanks to Paul Thaxton and Kim Englehart, Overjoyed on Twitter, for hosting a fun afternoon for moms and kids.  Now on to Phoenix for the next Primrose Mom Mixer. 

In Case You Missed It

As working mothers, the transition back to work is not always easy, especially if you are breastfeeding.  Information is the best form of equipping ourselves as mothers so as Founder of BlueSuitMom.com; I like to post articles and tv segments that provides a new twist on subjects related to work and family balance. Breastfeeding falls into that category. For that reason, I am posting the transcript of a recent Today Show segment on the subject, in case you missed it. 

 TODAY SHOW TRANSCRIPT

“IS BREASTFEEDING BEST?”

 DATE  03/16/2009  

NATALIE MORALES, co-anchor:

Back now at 8:13. An issue that every new mom faces--to breastfeed or not. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends women breastfeed exclusively for the first six months. But is it really the best option? Hanna Rosin writes an article in the new issue in The Atlantic; it's called "The Case Against Breastfeeding." And she's here along with Dr. Nancy Snyderman, who's NBC's chief medical editor. Nice to have you both here. Good morning.

 (In Unison) Hi.

MORALES: So as we mentioned,Nancy, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends breastfeeding for six months exclusively and then, what, up to a year?

Dr. NANCY SNYDERMAN reporting:

Then really up to a year. They really recommend the breastfeeding is the best, and so those are their recommendations and here are the reasons why. The science behind it is the idea that you get immuglobulins, you get extra protection for your immune system and with the belief that you lower the risk of ear infections, diarrhea, bronchitis and pneumonia, even problems like obesity and sudden infant death syndrome. Now, others are countering--

MORALES: So for the baby it's good.

SNYDERMAN: That's the advantage for the baby.

MORALES: For the mother--

SNYDERMAN: The question is always about, you know, bonding, losing some extra weight because it takes extra calories to breastfeed, but some challenge the science is not so strong. And I think what we've come down to is this argument, and I keep--frankly, I'm always amazed that we circle back to this, we almost pit mothers against each other. You're a bad mother if you don't breastfeed. You know, get off my back, I want to bottle feed. Nonetheless, that's where the American Academy of Pediatrics stands.

MORALES: And Hanna, you are, in fact, breastfeeding now your third child...

Ms. HANNA ROSIN (Contributing Editor, The Atlantic): Indeed, yes. Exactly.

MORALES: ...and you breastfed the first two...

Ms. ROSIN: I did, yes.

MORALES: ...despite the fact that your article is a case against breastfeeding.

Ms. ROSIN: I know. I know.

MORALES: You're not actually anti-breastfeeding.

Ms. ROSIN: No, I'm not anti-breastfeeding.

MORALES: It's just you talk about the societal pressures. Explain.

Ms. ROSIN: Yeah. I'm kind of amazed when I finally--new moms are really vulnerable, you go into the doctor's office, you read these magazines and they make you feel like you're putting your child in grave danger if you don't breastfeed them. You know, you're putting them at risk at getting obesity--being obese or getting diabetes or all these other different diseases, and then you read the scientific literature, and frankly, there isn't the solid evidence you'd expect to support all this. And we all know what a time commitment breastfeeding is. I mean it's a pretty serious commitment. It's not like a prenatal vitamin--

MORALES: And yet, you chose to breastfeed. Why did you choose to breastfeed if you felt that there is the societal pressure? I mean I breastfeed my two as well, but I didn't go the full six months. I didn't feel like a failure, though. I know I tried and I gave it my best.

Ms. ROSIN: You're a strong person. I feel like many people do feel like they fail if they can't breastfeed or if they have a trouble breastfeeding or they want to stop breastfeeding. They just feel like, 'Wow, I'm, you know, I'm giving my kid poison if I'm giving them formula,' and it really isn't like that.

SNYDERMAN: I think one of the problems is for those of us who go back into the workplace, it makes it sound so easy, you breastfeed for six months, you pump your breasts, you go back into the workplace. I have workplaces where there were quiet rooms for breastfeeding mothers. I've worked other places and I would say television news is probably one of the most inhospitable landscapes for mothers where it's like, 'What do you think?'

MORALES: Yeah, I would agree. I pumped in the bathroom at MSNBc. Not exactly a private space.

SNYDERMAN: It's a very different ball game. So I think we as a society have not addressed the issues and if you want to clear a zone of inhibition around your lunch table, breastfeed your baby in public and watch the businessmen think that you're a real social pariah.

Ms. ROSIN: And you ask me why I breastfeed, I actually really like to breastfeed, I think it's really nice to breastfeed, I just, you know, this idea that it's medicine, it's dangerous not to do it, I think that's what I object to. It's not the breastfeeding itself. It's really nice. I mean it's lovely. It's like you're loving on your kid.

MORALES: It's a bonding experience.

Ms. ROSIN: It's a bonding thing and it's really sweet. It's not medicine. You know, they've turned into this kind of vaccine and you have to give it to your kid or your putting your kid in danger.

MORALES: And formula, Nancy, these days formula, is it just as healthy an alternative to breast milk?

SNYDERMAN: Look, formula's wonderful and I think every woman should be encouraged to try breastfeed. Some women just can't. And for those women who can't, you know what, we need to back off and let them be and enjoy being mothers. There's no one perfect formula for everybody and most women will try a combination of both. And then, you know what, as a society we need to support young mothers. I think we do a very poor job right now.

MORALES: It's hard enough job getting started anyway as a new mom.

 

Promise Yourself A Better Night's Sleep

There are a lot of things that keep me up at night. It’s just the way it is when you are mom. Last night, I was met in the middle of the night by our black lab who was accidently left out of his cage.  The night before it was a teenager playing video games. The night before that, it was my daughter yelling at her rabbit who apparently is nocturnal.  Who knew rabbits were nocturnal?  

 

Yes, moms get little sleep but we learn to deal with it.  Truthfully, the one thing that keeps me up at night most often is the thought of sending my four children to college and paying for it.  I had the best intentions when they were born to stock away a few dollars every week. I did okay for the first three months but somehow something always got in the way- new tennis shoes, extra diapers, formula, private school tuition.  Just the other day I looked at my college accounts and realized that if I divided the contributions over the last 15 years of good intentions, I saved less than $1 a day.  

 

I tell you this story as a warning to young moms who are currently swaddling a baby or mothers of toddlers who think 18 years is a long way off.  Save. Save whatever you can because college is just around the corner.  In just three short years, my first two teenagers will be off to a university system that today announced 15% tuition hikes.  Ouch!  Even with my Florida College Prepaid programs, we will still be short of the new tuition.  

 

I hang my head that there are many things I didn’t do to prepare for college but I did do one thing that created a bright light for our family. I enrolled in Upromise ten years ago.  If you don’t know about Upromise, www.upromise.com, you need to click over right now and learn about it.  Basically, you register your credit cards and every time you spend money on normal everyday purchases, you earn money into your college account. I received $150 last year when we purchased our new car.  It doesn’t sound like much, but I am sure $150 is the price of a biology book or a few math workbooks.  Every cent counts and Upromise has allowed me to save even when I wasn’t thinking about it.  

 

Now Upromise is giving away big money tuitions in a promotion called Tuition-Tales, www.tuition-tales.com.  All you have to do is videotape your plea for tuition and upload it to the site.  The best videos win. It’s that easy.  

 

Moms have enough outside disruptions to a good night sleep, and now college tuition doesn’t have to be one of them.   Visit Upromise.com today and sleep better tonight.

 

The Wonder of the Disney Wonder

I love boating and I love my children.  However going out on a boat (albeit a big one) without my kids didn't really sound like much fun, particularly since it was a Disney Cruise.  I mean, how can a mom possibly have fun on any type of Disney vacation without her children? Well I'm here to confess that I had, without a doubt, a great time. 

 

My Disney Cruise adventure began with an invitation to join mom bloggers: Katja from Skimbaco Lifestyle, Melanie from Don’t Try This at Home, Denene from My Brown Baby, Amy from Selfish Mom, Kim from Traveling Mom, Arianne from To Think Is To Create, Former Disney Mom Panelist now turned Disney Cast Member, Laura Spencer and Jonathan Fernando of Disney Cruise Public Relations.  Of course I did what every 45-year-old mom of four would do as soon as she received an invitation to go to the Caribbean with 7 strangers; I went on a diet so that I could defy age, child-birth and gravity and wear a bikini. 

 

The second step was explaining to my kids why couldn't come on a cruise that they have been asking to take since they were 5 years old.  It took a big promise to cruise on the Disney Wonder before they are 18 to gain their approval.  I'd been on cruise ships in Europe but never in the US. I feared boredom without my children and being stuck on a floating vessel with no escape route if the boredom did set it. 

 

 The day of departure finally arrived.  Parking, luggage drop-off and check- in was swift and easy.  Even families with their hands full and kids in tow seemed happy throughout the process.  Greeters welcomed me on to the ship and I was officially on-board.

 

My stateroom was beautiful. I could have lived there for weeks. Not only did it have a sizable living area but a balcony.  An afternoon exploring the ship revealed several themed pools (including one for just adults), a fully equipped fitness center, an art gallery, several dining rooms, nursery, kids’ activity centers and even a movie theatre. If I was going to be bored on this ship, it would only be of my own doing. 

   

 

I quickly realized that the spa and fitness center had my name all over it.  Since I'd lost my taste buds, enjoying food was going to be challenge but every meal I saw looked absolutely delicious. It might have been a mixed blessing that I couldn't eat on this cruise because the food was endless and all included in the price of the cruise. I couldn't wait to tell my kids that they could eat endless chicken tenders, pizza, French fries and fruit.  They would think they died and went to heaven. 

 

It was the food that was endless, but the entertainment during the day and night followed suit.  A poolside pirate party featured the only at-sea firework show, three different Broadway shows entertained audiences twice a night and adults could escape to three different lounges.  Our group of adventurous mommy bloggers took the stage in a karaoke bar. I have NEVER gotten on stage to sing but somehow my newfound best friends talked me into a really horrible rendition of Girls Just Want to Have Fun.  The best part of the evening, however, was Amy’s version of Hopelessly Devoted To You. She was awesome!

   

 

The second day of our cruise we enjoyed an excursion in Nassau where we learned to ride Segways. What an incredible experience to be off road with 7 adventure seekers.  We celebrate our newfound abilities and Segway talents by introducing Arianne and Melanie to conch.  Okay, so it wasn't exactly a Midwesterner’s idea of meat but Denene and I loved it. We departed Nassau as the sun was setting on the way for Castaway Cay, Disney's private island.  Before dinner we introduced Denene to the relaxing world of saunas. Katja and Arrienne, Kim and Melanie were pros and even I learned a thing or two about enjoying a spa from them. I now know that the small hoses that protrude from the wall provide a cool respite from the hot steam.  Spa 101 at its finest.

 

I was also able to take advantage of the incredible fitness center. After I learned to run forward on the treadmill as the ship and machine was swaying from side to side, it was great.  I even did what no other woman would ever do on a cruise- I had a full body analysis done to measure my body fat and composition.  I am happy to report that I passed with flying colors and thankfully, as there was a hard hitting bet that I would have had to pay on if I didn't.  

 

Our final night was spent at an upscale restaurant aboard the ship. We all dressed up and looked like a very glamorous bunch.  The food was incredible or at least what I could taste of it.  I ate fish every night since I could smell it which made it seem like I tasted it.  The amazing thing about every dinner was that you could order two or even three entrees and taste each one. There were no difficult decisions on this cruise, Disney did it all for you. 

 

Castaway Cay was spectacular.  We fed live sting rays, rode bikes, snorkeled and vegged on lounge chairs on white sandy beaches. Of course, there was food too and lots of it, from barbecue to fresh fruit and steak.  We enjoyed walking the sidewalks in the sun and stopping every five minutes for Denene and Katja to take another picture (which by the way were incredible shots).  Visit their blogs to view them.

   

 

Sunday morning came too fast and it was time to say good bye to friends that I felt I had known forever.  The company, of course, was above and beyond my expectations but so was the Disney wonder. I couldn't wait to get home to tell my children how much fun it was and select a date to take them with me again.  The biggest surprise to the whole experience is just how affordable it is.  Even with a family of six, it's a better value than a trip to the Keys or a weekend driving getaway.  I had been completely wrong about having any apprehension that I wouldn't enjoy being on a boat without my kids. The weekend experience ranks at the top of my list among visits to Greece, South Africa and camping trips in the mountains. 

 

Ironically, however, the most impressive aspect of the Disney cruise came a week my experience when a customer service member called to say they were mailing me a pair of jogging shorts and my bikini which had been found in my stateroom. I sleep 300 nights a year in a hotel and believe me, I've left a few items behind. I have NEVER had a single item returned, nevertheless have someone call me to admit finding it.  Only Disney would offer such a high level of customer service.  It's a touch of wonder I won't soon forget.

 

 

Top 100 Blogs for Expecting Mothers

It's nice to be recognized and this blog just received a great honor. BlueSuitMom was named among the "Top 100 Blogs for Expecting Mothers"! Click here to read about it and peruse the other blogs on the list. There some great blogs, on everything from pregnancy to post-partum depression.  

The Ultimate Mom- Check out my new book cover!

I’m so excited to share the cover of my new book with my readers. Here’s a sneak preview:

The Children's Place Win & Wear It Giveaway Sweepstakes

What mother doesn’t love The Children’s Place? With their top quality fashions and accessories for kids sizes 0-14, The Children’s Place is a one-stop shopping experience for any family. And through their Win & Wear It Giveaway Sweepstakes, you have an opportunity to win one of four $1,000 Children's Place shopping sprees! Click here to enter for your chance to win. Sweepstakes runs through January 18, 2009.

One Proud Mom

Don’t you love these moments when you are a proud mom? I mean you are beaming ear to ear with a smile!  It makes all the challenges of motherhood worthwhile.

I can’t help but share my moment with you:

Pompano brothers collecting shoes for needy kids in South Africa

By Faran Fagen | Special Correspondent

January 11, 2009

While many students were volunteering at school fundraisers or tutoring younger children to earn their required community service hours, three Pompano Beach siblings have been busy scraping the dirt off the bottom of metal cleats in their kitchen sink.

More than satisfying a community service requirement, Keenan, Owen and Madison Bailey's Share A Shoe initiative will provide gently used cleats for South African children.

Heading into December, the trio had collected more than 100 pairs from friends, family and neighbors. They are preparing to ship the first batch to the SOS Children's Village of South Africa for distribution to children living in shack villages.

"It's a lot of fun doing it for people in Africa because we're helping them," said Madison, a 15-year-old at Cardinal Gibbons High School. "We wanted to do something special for our community hours that really helped people."

The idea came from the youngest of the three siblings: Keenan, a 13-year-old at St. Coleman's Catholic School in Pompano Beach.

While on a business trip this summer to South Africa with his mother, Maria Bailey, Keenan noticed that the children were playing lots of soccer — shoeless — on gravel fields. He thought about his soccer-playing friends back home and how they would throw out a pair of cleats after having only used them for a year.

Keenan brought pictures back from the trip, including pictures of the children playing shoeless. When his two siblings saw the photographs, the idea for Share A Shoe began to take shape.

The trio passed out fliers to family and friends and went door-to-door, asking for shoe donations. They collected from their church and used their Facebook accounts to collect shoes from families outside South Florida. A Web site is in the works, www.shareashoe. org.

More than 100 pairs of used cleats were collected, cleaned and prepped for shipping by including a small note on each shoe that read "Kids here care."

"They're absolutely making a difference, and they're making a difference globally," Maria Bailey said. "The fact that they're motivating other people to have some sense of global community is very important, too."

The SOS Children's Village of South Africa features group homes where children without families live. During the summer trip, Keenan met with executives and explained that many of his friends in the United States wear their cleats for one athletic season and then look for places to donate them. Officials said they would gladly distribute the used cleats to needy children if Keenan could collect them.

One more element to the effort: Mom agreed to pay the shipping, and couldn't be happier to do so.

"I'm extremely proud of them for making an impact," she said. "I try to teach them that the world can exist outside their community. They have done so much work. It makes me feel like they've learned some good lessons."

 

A Seminole Mom Cries Tears of Fears

There are a lot of things I want for my children as they grow older- one of them is NOT to become Florida Gators.  Oh, the tears I shed when I saw these pictures on my child's camera.  Enough said.